SONGS/VIDEOS TO MAKE YOU FEEL PROUD – IN CELEBRATION OF PRIDE and LOVE EVERYWHERE!

In celebration of Gay Pride, Love and Positive Energy – I decided to share some music videos that have thought provoking messages, are relevant in terms of the songs message or simply make you feel like you want to dance.  Whether you identify as gay, straight, bisexual or transgender – let your true colours fly and do it without judging someone else’s authenticity.  Now let’s celebrate PRIDE by spreading love and positive energy into the world:

NOTHING REALLY MATTERS (REMIX) – Madonna

YOU DON’T KNOW – Cyndi Lauper

FEEL WHAT YOU WANT – Kristine W

FREE – Ultra Nate

POWER OF LOVE – Deee-Lite

PROUD – Heather Small

MODERN LOVE – Rupaul

A LITTLE RESPECT (HMI Redux) – Erasure

AFTER ALL – Billie Ray Martin

GLASS & PATRON – FKA Twigs

BRING THE NOIZE – M.I.A.

LIGHT IN PLACES – Peaches

LIVING FOR LOVE (Remix) – Madonna

Let music move you towards creating positive change in the world.  Allow LOVE into your heart and live with positive energy within your heart.

HAPPY PRIDE to everyone!!!

Together, we can make the world a more positive one!

I AM GAY and I LOVE IT!!!

In celebration of the beginning of Gay Pride festivities around the world and Gay Pride month, I thought I would reflect on how society viewed me as a gay male and how I felt I had to oppress my feelings towards other men – ultimately oppressing my true authentic self.  First – let me say this:  I don’t remember choosing my sexuality, I just remember always being attracted to the same-sex. 

Here are some questions that people have asked me about my sexuality or comments people have made after I revealed that I was gay:

When did you realized you were gay?

I can’t pinpoint the exact moment I knew that I was attracted to the same-sex.  I always knew that I was.  I enjoyed being around girls – but I didn’t feel the same way as I did when I was around the same-sex.

If you knew you were gay, why did you date girls?

Wanting to be accepted is very difficult.  Today – that concept doesn’t even matter to me but as a child, teenager and young adult, who didn’t want to be accepted and fit in?  I dated girls because I witnessed first hand how our society treated homosexuals – they were teased, bullied, mocked, threatened with violence and even threatened with death.  I didn’t want any of that to happen to me – so I thought, my best choice would be to blend in and do what everyone else was doing.  I didn’t have the strength and self-confidence I needed to be myself.  I dated girls in hopes to suppress who I truly was because society was telling me that what I was feeling was against everything.

Why didn’t you ‘come out’?

See above.  Also – coming out meant possibly losing your friends and family.  What would I do?  Where would I go?  How would I take care of myself?  

When did you decide to ‘come out’?

High school was tough.  I wasn’t unpopular but I wasn’t exactly the football jock either.  There were many guys who called me “faggot”, “homo”, “cocksucker”, “butt muncher” and “fairy” – just to name a few.  They didn’t call me those names because I was ‘out’ but because the majority of my friends consisted of girls.  I was envious of the kids who were comfortable enough to be ‘out’ and took my frustrations out on them by doing the exact same thing to them as what others were doing to me.

I suppressed my feelings and turned to alcohol – I was meeting guys secretly and became very withdrawn.  I discovered our gay community and started frequenting gay bars and began to meet other gay people.  I dated a few guys (secretly) and had “boyfriends” but I would always go back to my ‘straight’  and ‘fake’ lifestyle so that people would not discover my truth. 

I was at a bar one night and ran into a girl I used to date – I girl I thought I loved for all the wrong reasons only to realized that I love her for all the right reasons.  (It wasn’t a sexual thing but a very emotional one).  I ran into her at a very popular bar – I saw her throughout the night but didn’t want to approach her.  What would she think?  How will she react to seeing me at a gay bar?  We eventually connected and the issue wasn’t as difficult as I believed it to be.  Being truthful to someone else was great but it was even more exhilarating being truthful to myself.  This was the push I needed to begin living my true authentic life.

I met my first real boyfriend and decided to leave home and moved in with him at 21.  I never looked back.

How does it feel to be gay?

The same way it feels to be straight – I have to wake-up, go to work, pay bills, etc.  I sometimes fight with my significant other about the struggles of daily life.  I go to the bathroom the same way straight people do, I bleed the same way, I have the same feelings, dreams and goals. 

Homosexuality is a sin and an abomination.

I guess that I will wait to be judged by God.  That was my old answer.  Today, I simply allow people to believe what they want.  They can hide their ignorance behind religion and what men wrote in the Bible.  To me – God isn’t judgemental, He/She/It – isn’t hateful.  He/She/It encourages love and compassion.  I don’t answer to ‘heresay’ – I answer to how I want to live and how I want to treat others – to me that is God therefore I AM GOD, YOU ARE GOD, WE ARE ALL GOD.  So don’t hate yourself – embrace and love yourself because, loving yourself ensures you love everyone.

Why does there have to be a Gay Pride Parade – there isn’t straight pride?

Gay people – like African-Americans, didn’t have the same civil liberties as their peers.  Homosexuality is continues to be a death sentence in many countries.  Gays, lesbians, transgendered and bisexual individuals are still fighting for the right not to be discriminated against in the place they work, the right to benefit from marriage and to be deemed equals in the eyes of the law as to their straight counter-parts.  We don’t want to continue to be suppressed and oppressed – we want the right to live and to love, just like everyone else.

Gay Pride has become a corporate event.  It gives businesses the opportunity to make money and boost the local economy.  It increases tourism.  It is fun and is a party.  Gay Pride is also an opportunity to remember all those who have paved the way for those of us who are benefiting from their activism.  A time to reflect on the bath house raids of Stonewall in New York City and Toronto.  It is a time to reflect on the politicians who wanted equality and paid the price with their lives (thank you Harvey Milk).  It is a time to see mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts and friends unite and celebrate each others diversity.  Gay Pride is a time of year to celebrate your sexuality and not be ashamed of it or your body.  It is a time to celebrate gay fathers, policemen, politicians, teachers, bus drivers, business men and women, and so many others living their authentic lives.

GAY PRIDE is inclusive and inspiring.  It allows others to see that we are the same as everyone else.  GAY PRIDE also gives those who are living a life that I previous lived – a life of oppression, suppression, hurt and pain and make them realize that they are not alone. 

HAPPY GAY PRIDE MONTH!

Together, we can make the world a more positive one! 

IN CELEBRATION OF PRIDE – MUSIC VIDEOS

I thought I would share some of my favorite videos to get you pumped and ready for Gay Pride celebrations around the world……ENJOY!!!!   HAPPY PRIDE!!!

MADONNA – Human Nature

KRISTINE W – Land of the Living

ERASURE – A Little Respect (HMI Redux)

DEEE-LITE – Power Of Love

ULTRA NATE – Free

CYNDI LAUPER – You Don’t Know

RUPAUL – Free To Be

SIR ARI GOLD – Love Will Take Over

GOSSIP – Heavy Cross

EN VOGUE – Free Your Mind

GEORGE MICHAEL – Outside

LADY GAGA – Born This Way

JANET JACKSON – Together Again

MACKELMORE & RYAN LEWIS – Same Love

You can find all these songs on iTunes or by visiting the artists official website.

Have a safe and HAPPY PRIDE!

Together, we can make the world a more positive one!

IS THERE REALLY A NEED FOR GAY PRIDE PARADES???

As we head into the month of June – many countries around the world are gearing up for their Gay Pride celebrations, events and parades.  The LGBT (lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, trans-gendered) community has a lot to celebrate same-sex couples are able to marry in more countries around the world, gay athletes (especially males) are breaking down the stereotypes in the world of professional sports and each day, more people are letting go of their biased notions of what is to be gay.  Saying this – there is still many people who are threatened by homosexuality.  These people will do anything to block any rights for the LGBT community – they don’t want homosexuals to marry, they don’t want gays and lesbians to be protected against discrimination in the workplace, they don’t want their children exposed to LGBT youth, they oppose gays in the military to serve openly, they detest that young gay boys be allowed into the boy scouts – in fact, they don’t want gays and lesbians to live their authentic lives openly because of their own discomfort and prejudices.  Most people have these prejudices because of their strict religious beliefs (which is a completely different topic in itself).

Many heterosexuals and homosexuals believe that the parade is about people exposing themselves to the world, a big drug and alcoholic sex orgy of people flaunting their sexuality.  People have said such things about Gay Pride parades “we don’t have a straight pride, so why should they have gay pride”, “I don’t want my kids to see this kind of promiscuity”, “why should they have a sex parade?” and other comments of this nature.  So – do we really need to have Gay Pride parades and celebrations around the world?  ABSOLUTELY!  Here is why:

• 1965, Everett Klippert acknowledges to police that he is gay, has had sex with men over a 24-year period, and is unlikely to change.  In 1967, Klippert is sent to prison indefinitely as a “dangerous sex offender,” a sentence which was backed up by the Supreme Court of Canada that same year.
• Justice Minister Pierre Trudeau amendments to the Criminal Code which, among other things, would relax the laws against homosexuality.
• Trudeau’s amendments to the Criminal Code pass, decriminalizing homosexuality in Canada
• homosexuality isn’t something that reared its head in the 20th century – gays, lesbians, bisexual, transgendered people have been with since the dawn of humanity.
• The Stonewall riots (New York, 1969) transform the gay rights movement into a widespread protest for equal rights and acceptance.  Patrons of a gay bar in New York’s Greenwich Village, the Stonewall Inn, fight back during a police raid on June 27, sparking three days of riots.
• 1971, Everett Klippert is released
• 1973, The American Psychiatric Association removes homosexuality from its official list of mental disorders.
• 1977, Quebec, Canada includes sexual orientation in its Human Rights Code, making it the first province in Canada to pass a gay civil rights law.
• Harvey Milk is appointed to the Board of Permit Appeals by San Francisco Mayor George Moscone – he becomes first openly gay city commissioner in the United States.
• January 8, 1978 – Harvey Milk is sworn in as member of the San Fransisco Board of Supervisors.  He ran against 16 other candidates , he wins the election by 30% .  Milk begins his term by sponsoring a civil rights bill that outlaws sexual orientation discrimination.  Only one supervisor votes against it and Mayor Mascone signs it into law.
• November 27, 1978, Harvey Milk and Mayor George Mascone are assassinated by Dan White, another San Fransisco city supervisor.
• 1978, Canada gets a new Immigration Act.  Under the act, being a homosexual is removed from the list of inadmissible classes.
• 1979 – 75,000 people participated in the National March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights in Washington D.C., in October.  It was the largest political gathering in support of LGBT rights to date.
• 1980 – The Democratic National Convention held at New York’s Madison Square Garden, Democrats took a stance supporting gay rights adding the following to their plank:  “All groups must be protected from discrimination based on race, color, religion, national origin, language, age, sex or sexual orientation.
• 1981, More than 300 men are arrested following police raids at four gay bath houses in Toronto, the largest mass arrest since the War Measures Act was invoked during the October Crisis.  The next night, about 3,000 people march in downtown Toronto to protest the arrests.  This is considered to be Canada’s Stonewall.
• 1982, Wisconsin becomes the first state to outlaw discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation.
• 1984, The city of Berkeley, California becomes the first city to offer its employees domestic-partnership benefits.
• 1988, Sven Robinson, of the New Democratic Party, goes public about being gay, becoming the first Member of Parliament to do so.
• Delwin Vriend, a lab instructor at King’s University College in Edmonton, Alberta, is fired from his job because he is gay.  The Alberta Human Rights Commission refuses to investigate the case because discrimination based on sexual orientation isn’t covered by the Alberta Individual Rights Protection Act.  Vriend takes the government of Alberta to court and, in 1994, the court rules that sexual orientation must be added to the act.  The government wins on appeal in 1996 and the decision is overturned.  In 1997, the case went to the Supreme Court of Canada and on April 2, 1998 the high court unanimously ruled that the exclusion of homosexuals from the province’s Individual Rights Protection Act violates the Charter of Rights and Freedoms.  The Supreme Court said that effective immediately the act would be interpreted to include homosexuals even if the province doesn’t change it.  The Alberta government chose to use the notwithstanding clause despite pressure from conservative and religious groups.
• In 1992, The federal court lifts the country’s ban on homosexuals in the military, allowing gays and lesbians to serve in the armed forces.
• 1993, The “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy is instituted for the U.S. military, permitting gays to serve in the military but banning homosexual activity.
• 1995, The Supreme Court of Canada rules on the case involving Jim Egan and Jack Nesbit, two gay men who sued Ottawa for the right to claim spousal pension under the Old Age Security Act.  The Court ruled against Egan and Nesbit.  However, all nine judges agreed that sexual orientation is a protected ground and that the protection extends to partnerships of lesbians and gay men.
•  1995, a Ontario (Canada) Court judge finds that the Child and Family Services Act of Ontario infringes section 15 of the Charter by not allowing same-sex couples to bring a joint application for adoption.  He rules that four lesbians have the right to adopt their partner’s children.  Ontario becomes the first province to make it legal for same-sex couples to adopt.  British Columbia, Alberta and Nova Scotia followed suit, also allowing adoption by same-sex couples. 
• 1996, The Canadian federal government passes Bill C-33 which adds “sexual orientation” to the Canadian Human Rights Act.
• 1999, The Supreme Court of Canada rules same-sex couples should have the same benefits and obligations as opposite-sex common-law couples and equal access to benefits from social programs to which they contribute.
• 1999, Attorney General Jim Flaherty introduces Bill 5 in the Ontario (Canada) Legislature, an act to amend certain statutes because of a Supreme Court of Canada decision.  Instead of changing the province’s definition of spouse, which the Supreme Court essentially struck down, the government creates a new same-sex category, changing the province’s Family Law Act to read “spouse or same-sex partner” wherever it had read only “spouse” before.  Bill 5 also amends more than 60 other provincial laws, making the rights and responsibilities of same-sex couples mirror those of common-law couples.
• 2000, Vermont (USA) becomes the first state in the country to legally recognize civil unions between gay and lesbian couples.
• 2004, Same-sex marriage becomes legal in Massachusetts (USA)
• 2005, Canada becomes the 4th country to allow same-sex marriage (the first outside of Europe).  Although same-sex marriage was legal in Ontario and British Columbia (2003), Quebec, Yukon, Manitoba, Nova Scotia, Saskatchewan, Newfoundland and Labrador (2004) and New Brunswick (2005) – Civil Marriage Act, Alberta, Prince Edward Island, Nunavut and the Northwest Territory (2005). 
• 2011, New York becomes the largest US State to allow same-sex couples to marry.  The vote comes on the eve of the city’s annual Gay Pride Parade and gives new momentum to the national gay-rights movement.

I find it astounding how – like the civil rights movement – that this type of discrimination against a country’s people was even debated to ensure all were treated equally under the law.  How is it that we needed to debate that people of color should be allowed into the same public space as white people – I find it outrageous and appalling that it took people so long to realize that this was wrong in every sense of the word.  The gay rights movement is a movement to ensure that gays, lesbians, bisexual and trans-gendered people are treated equally and protected under the law.  We are not perverts or sexual molesters.  We are not any more promiscuous than those of the heterosexual preference.  We don’t have a ‘gay agenda’ just like heterosexuals don’t have a ‘straight agenda’…..the hate, bias, prejudice and violence only begins when you add religion into the equation.

Pride Parades – may not have the same ‘grass-roots’ message as it did 40 years ago and has become a huge opportunity for corporations to advertise their products, despite this and the media focusing their reports on scantily clad men and women, the parade and the message the LGBT community is trying to convey is that we are just like you.  I don’t hear people protesting the Mardi Gras parade in New Orleans or Caribana in Ontario or Carnival in Rio de Janeiro, why?  Is it because those events are celebrations that are inclusive to all (mainly heterosexuals)?

In a world where 76 countries ban gay sex and 7 have a death penalty (as of June 2010) – Why is it that people still feel so strongly against those who want to celebrate their diversity without any fear of violence or death?  (In most countries).  Uganda held its first Gay Pride Parade recently even though the country has made it clear that they have no tolerance for homosexuality (remember the KILL THE GAYS bill?).  To me – this is the fundamental reasons for Gay Pride celebrations around the world.  France – recently favoured same-sex marriage, yet crimes against the LGBT community have increased.  Russia has insisted they will not tolerate gay propaganda and Prime Minister Vladimir Putin has stated that he is opposed to same-sex marriage and will not be influenced by those countries who support it – this has also caused an increase in violence against LGBT people in Russia.

So again, I ask you, is there a need for Gay Pride Celebrations around the world.  I believe so.  History has shown that oppression was never the right route – because when you oppress people they will rise and in the long run, they will win!

Together, we can make the world a more positive one! 

 

GAY PRIDE MONTH – Gay themed posts for the month of JUNE

I figure since most countries celebrate Gay Pride during the month of June – I thought I would write gay themed posts.  Today’s post is to pay tribute to individuals who have contributed to gay culture and paved the way for the gay rights movement.  These people are symbols for equality and that have always supported the gay community.  They are my personal favourites – enjoy!

MADONNA – Pop ICON, Queen of Pop, Philanthropist, Movie Star, Director, Fashion Icon, Diva.  Madonna is by far the most celebrated female artist of the 20th century.  She has broken countless chart records and currently holds the title for highest grossing solo touring artist of all-time.  With her current tour just kicking off – will she be able to surpass her last touring effort.  Only time with tell!

LOUISE L. HAY – Writer, humanitarian, business woman and self-help guru.  Louise L. Hay moved to Los Angeles in 1980 and had several gay clients.  She was asked to start a gay men’s support group – she had a few men over for dinner one night – they talked, repeated affirmations and ended with song.  A week later – the group had 90 participants which then snow-balled to 850 every night.  She is currently 85 – and continues to share her message of love and positivity.  She tours across the country to promote wellness for the body, mind, soul and spirit – watch for the I CAN DO IT tour coming to a city near you throughout the year.

JIMMY SOMMERVILLE – In the early 80’s, Jimmy Sommerville belonged to a band called Bronski Beat.  They released 2 songs that were huge hits in the early 80’s – Why and Small Town Boy.  As a teen during this time – I was amazed how this song was received, after all it was a ‘coming out’ story about a bullied gay male?  Who knew it would be such a big hit and now classic gay anthem!  Jimmy also was in the band called The Communards – they were responsible for the remake of Thelma Houston’s disco classic “Don’t Leave Me This Way”.  Thanks Jimmy for being true to who you are!  Jimmy continues to create great music as a solo artist.

ELTON JOHN – Yes, he is a bit of a diva but you can’t deny that Elton, along with his writing partner – Bernie Taupin have created the most memorable pop tunes in the 70’s, 80’s and 90’s.  After coming out publicly and later marrying David Furnish – Elton has remained a pop icon for more than 4 decades.  One of my favourite Elton songs (of many) is from the cd The One – the song is called ‘The Last Song’ – this came out during the AIDS epidemic and had a rather touching and compelling video.  Along with his classic hits – Elton was pivotal in raising money for AIDS charities.  Elton was a guest and sang at Matthew Sheppard’s funeral.

MARGARET CHO – Margaret is a stand-up comic (one of my all time favourites) and had a ground-breaking and controversial television show, All-American Girl.  The show was short-lived and Margaret decided to give it her all on her one-woman show, I’m The One That I Want.  The show was a hit which became a best-selling book and feature film.  Margaret has always supported the LGBT community and has been nominated for 2 Grammy Awards and honoured by GLAAD (Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation).  She has since had several sold-out tours – Notorious C.H.O. and Revolution.  She is currently seen in the comedy/drama – Drop Dead Diva.  She is also embarking on a new tour called Margaret Cho’s Mother Tour.

There are so many more celebrities in the public eye that have a direct link in helping me accept my homosexuality – past and present.  They were detrimental in helping me become comfortable in my own skin and provided the soundtrack to my life.  Their movies, music or words allowed me confront my own homophobia and shaped me in becoming the man I am today, they are:  Boy George, George Michael, Depeche Mode, Alison Moyet, Grace Jones, John Waters, Ian McKellan, Rupert Everett, Greg Louganis, Tom Ford, Roseanne Barr, Judith Light, Dan Savage, Bill Maher, Peaches, Billie Ray Martin, OMD, New Order, The Cure, EllenDegeneres, Alan Cumming, Wanda Sykes, Divine, Rupaul, Rachel Madow, Rosie O’Donnell, Alan Ball, Lily Tomlin and Melissa Etheridge, Lady Ga Ga, just to name a few.

I am thankful and grateful that there are people in the world spreading their support for equality no matter what gender you are, sexual orientation, religious denomination, political party and ethnicity.  I also want to thank those in my immediate circle (friends and family) who have stood by me and have given me their unconditional love when I didn’t know if I had the strength in me to survive.  I am here because of all of you and all of your love – I hope that that love and positive energy has found it’s way back to you!

THANK YOU and HAPPY GAY PRIDE!!!!

GAY PRIDE PARADE’S and why THEY MUST CONTINUE

Every year – I hear the same comments from friends and family about the Gay Pride Parade’s that happen all over the world, comments like; “we don’t have a straight pride parade”, “why do you all have to parade around the streets naked”, “what goes on in your bedroom’s should stay in your bedroom’s, I don’t want to see that” – just to quote a few.

For one – in terms of not having a ‘straight pride parade’, I believe the answer to that is – everyday is straight pride.  There is no reason to have a parade because it is normal for all straight people to celebrate their heterosexuality everyday – and believe me, they do!  Heterosexuals display their sexual orientation in public everyday without fear of being verbally or physically assaulted.

As far as ‘parading around naked’ – the media sensationalizes this by showcasing the individuals who choose to wear limited clothing.  Also, the majority of naked ‘people’ are those that belong to an exclusive group called TNT men.  I believe in freedom of expression and if this is how they choose to express themselves – then so be it.  Most people tend to feel more uncomfortable with sexuality and the human body then seeing someone shot to death, isn’t sexuality more natural then violence?

Let me just point out why the LGBT community have come together to celebrate their diversity and to show the world that it is okay to be different and to not conform to what society believes to be ‘normal’ or ‘right’.

1. Homosexuality is still illegal in many countries around the world – you can be imprisoned or even put to death for being homosexual.
2. Numerous studies have shown that lesbian, gay and bisexual youth have a higher rate of suicide attempts than do heterosexual youth.  The Suicide Prevention Resource Centre synthesized these studies and estimated that between 30 and 40% of LGBT youth, depending on age and sex groups, have attempted suicide.
3. We want the same civil liberties as our heterosexual counterparts.  In some countries gay couples are not allowed to adopt children, allowed to visit their partners in hospitals or have access to their finances should anything happen to one of them.
4. Gay Pride parades/celebrations are a celebration of diversity and discussion – like the civil rights movement, we have sent a message to the rest of society that oppressing and discriminating against people for the colour of their skin, sexual orientation, gender etc is not right.
5. We must ensure that we never forget our history by remembering the past – The Stonewall riots, bath house raids, AIDS crisis, the Holocaust (yes – Hitler exterminated homosexuals during his mass genocide).
6. As I have mentioned before – today, homosexuals around the world are being killed just for being born gay/lesbian/bisexual – THIS IS NOT OKAY!

I don’t think I need to continue my discussion on why I believe that Gay Pride Parades are empowering, positive, energetic, inclusive, diverse, positive and healing.  They not only bring communities together – they are great for economies and they bring the world communities together without bias of religious denomination, tradition or ethnicity – Gay Pride is a celebration of diversity.

I will definitely support my cities pride events to ensure that we continue to build a better tomorrow without prejudice, judgement and fear.

HAPPY PRIDE EVERYONE!

***please note – images are not my own and have been uploaded from the internet – I am thankful for whomever created these images***